– Est. 1981

The One Month Update

Today Hazel is one month old. After a month of fatherhood this is what I have learned.

1. Your wife is going to be possessive, emotional and irrational at times. Shut up and clean the bottles.

2.  Your wife is going to be very busy during the day, especially if you are working. Feeding a newborn every 1-2 hours is very frustrating. Shut up and prepare the bottles.

3. Your wife is very lonely while you're at work. She may refer to inanimate objects as "Wilson", or if you have pets she may speak to them as if they were Wilson. When you get home from work she's going to talk your ear off. Prepare for this any way you see fit but when you get home, shut up and listen. When she starts to speak too fast to keep up just listen for inflection, or the end of sentences and respond with "Wow, great idea.", "Fuck yah! That's what I was thinking!" and my favorite "Hahaha!"

4. Cook huge pots of stuff for her to eat during the day. My favorite is chicken noodle soup. Use a crock pot. Make it microwavable.

5. Shut up and clean the bottles.

6. Try to take at least a week off of work. Do all of the laundry, dishes, cleaning, lawn work during this week. Try to be available to help when needed but get these things done before you go back!

7. Watch the baby in the middle of the day when you can so your wife can sleep.

8. Stop updating your blog and feed the baby while she scrapbooks.

10. Ten is a nice round number.



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